Is That Really Your Only Hobby?
It's been a while since I've last written a blog and mainly that is due to the fact that I went back to work and had another baby...Working two jobs and having four kids kind of hinders one's ability to do basically most things. It also makes it much more likely that a Mormon will stop you and ask what Ward you're in, true story. As well as the likelihood of a friend without children saying the words, "That's your life right now. Whooping cough."
My lack of ME, if you will, was brought to my attention especially last night when I was called by a telemarketer who was trying to get me to buy a package to go to Las Vegas. I kindly advised her that I was not interested in a trip, I just had a baby and won't be leaving town any time soon (if EVER). She must've had a manager evaluating her because regardless of my answers she would not let me get off the phone. So she asks what other things I am interested in, what do I do for fun? I actually paused for at least three minutes. I mean total awkward silence because I had nothing. Just to hurry the conversation, as my two middle children were about to kill each other, I said "yoga", which I haven't done in about a year and a half. She said "that's it? Is that really your only hobby? What do you do to relax?" Finally it came out..."Nothing! I do nothing to relax! I work two jobs I have four kids and I have to get off the phone now because it's their bed time so thanks for calling, but NO THANKS!" She was stunned and reluctantly hung up the phone. I'm still in shock at how rude she was. Oh well! Here's to changing diapers as a hobby! I know that this hiatus from all that is ME will end as they grow a bit older so I am not worried about putting myself on hold for them at least for the time being.
Lately, as we get ready for Christmas, we have been trying to curb all that is spoiled in this household. Cookie the Elf made an appearance for about three days before packing up and heading back to the North Pole because of these little tyrants and their constant revolt. My seven year old, JACSON, argues EVERYTHING and spends most of his free time in time out. They say it's good to have kids who question things because they are less likely to become followers and I'm over here thinking, you questioned me when I asked you to put your shoes on so we could leave for school, but you didn't question yourself when you made the ingenious decision to turn the lights off, and scare the crap out of your two year old brother while wearing nothing but slippers and jump kicking in the air yelling, "naked Yoda ninja! naked Yoda ninja!"
Or then there was the time my husband was sleeping after working the night shift and I asked Jacson to be quiet. About three minutes after being in the bathroom I hear Jacson belting "Hello" by Adele at the top of his lungs. I ran out into the kitchen and said, "Jacson! What did I say to you before going into the bathroom?" Jacson: "be quiet....OHHHHH....But I love this song and I wanted to sing!"
My four year old, LIAM, has been hanging out with a jerk at school and bringing home some of his lovely behaviors such as grunting instead of using words to ask for things. He also enjoys body slamming my two year to the ground, but in his defense my two year old is a beast who has a tendency to bite so...I try to bond with him as much as I can, but his heart belongs to his daddy. I'm not complaining, there are worse things than having an awesome dad! The other day while waiting to pick up Jacson from school, Liam pulled a hair out of my head in an attempt to wrestle me like he does with his dad (lovely I know), and I decided to take the opportunity to show him the hair strand and teach him about DNA. I thought he'd be fascinated by the fact that each person has their own code and we can tell who was where with one strand of hair or a finger print or a drop of blood. He stopped for a minute as if he were deep in thought, he stuck his finger in his ear, pulled out some wax and jammed it in my mouth. Then he said, "Now you've got my DNA on your tooth!" So much for that moment.
My two year old, RORY, is such a cuddle monster and I mean that literally. He is constantly hugging and kissing everyone but he's so rough he might head butt you and break your nose in the process. This makes having a new baby in the house close to impossible as I live in fear of ever putting her down. I wonder what the neighbors think when they hear me scream, "Get off of her Rory!" He just giggles and runs away after nearly smothering her with "love." Being a tough guy does have its perks, however. He can completely destroy himself and instantly stop crying if I kiss the booboo. We're talking a terrible welt in his head and he makes a miraculous recovery with one kiss. This however, back fired when he fell onto an open drawer hurting his butt. "Kiss the butt mommy! KISS THE BUTT!"
This kid is so stubborn that he refuses to take a nap. I can lock him in his room and he will be quiet for an hour. When I go to wake him, he's sitting in his chair staring at the door. Totally creepy. At night he gives me some trouble with bed time as well. He will sit there holding the baby monitor and yell, "Goooonight mommy! I La You! Don't shut the door!" over and over again then suddenly, in his little deep voice, he'll say, "goodbye mommy." There I am thinking, goodbye? why would he say goodbye? is he okay? Don't you think it's weird for a child to say goodbye at bedtime!? We've finally come to an agreement where I won't shut the door if he stays in bed and so far so good.
He and the four year old are in an ongoing battle over basically all things in existence. This morning, for no apparent reason, though I'm sure it was provoked, he grabbed Liam's hot chocolate and threw it across the room, breaking the cup and splattering hot chocolate everywhere. As I cleaned it, the dogs took that opportunity to knock over the trash and so I was about two minutes late dropping Jacson off at school. I drove up to the school already defensive. If these people send him out to have me find a parking spot, take all of my children into the office just to tell them that he is two minutes late, which I'm sure they can see for themselves, I'm going to lose my shit. Did I mention my husband is at a wedding in the Florida Keys? He is going to owe me for life.
Needless to say, these kids are crazy, but they are also amazing! Jacson is scoring in the top 98th percentile in reading and math and he is competing in his first gymnastics meet this weekend. Although, him and Liam do not get along, he is amazing with the two youngest ones, which is a big help. Liam is super sweet with all kids not named Rory, he's very brave, he worships his dad and he's already athletically inclined. Rory is a beast who is scary strong, he is learning to speak so well, and he is totally into music, dancing and acting. It's the BEST to watch him FEEL the music or act out a death scene during his HULK SMASH routine! And then there is little Miss Marley who is super sweet and finding her place in this circus. I love this crew and although I might feel like I'm losing the battle at times, I know we must be doing something right to have such awesome little people. Maybe they are my hobby for now, but I'm choosing to be okay with that... I should have asked that woman if they have any packages revolving around showers and sleep.
My lack of ME, if you will, was brought to my attention especially last night when I was called by a telemarketer who was trying to get me to buy a package to go to Las Vegas. I kindly advised her that I was not interested in a trip, I just had a baby and won't be leaving town any time soon (if EVER). She must've had a manager evaluating her because regardless of my answers she would not let me get off the phone. So she asks what other things I am interested in, what do I do for fun? I actually paused for at least three minutes. I mean total awkward silence because I had nothing. Just to hurry the conversation, as my two middle children were about to kill each other, I said "yoga", which I haven't done in about a year and a half. She said "that's it? Is that really your only hobby? What do you do to relax?" Finally it came out..."Nothing! I do nothing to relax! I work two jobs I have four kids and I have to get off the phone now because it's their bed time so thanks for calling, but NO THANKS!" She was stunned and reluctantly hung up the phone. I'm still in shock at how rude she was. Oh well! Here's to changing diapers as a hobby! I know that this hiatus from all that is ME will end as they grow a bit older so I am not worried about putting myself on hold for them at least for the time being.
So let's dive into my new "HOBBY" of raising children.
Lately, as we get ready for Christmas, we have been trying to curb all that is spoiled in this household. Cookie the Elf made an appearance for about three days before packing up and heading back to the North Pole because of these little tyrants and their constant revolt. My seven year old, JACSON, argues EVERYTHING and spends most of his free time in time out. They say it's good to have kids who question things because they are less likely to become followers and I'm over here thinking, you questioned me when I asked you to put your shoes on so we could leave for school, but you didn't question yourself when you made the ingenious decision to turn the lights off, and scare the crap out of your two year old brother while wearing nothing but slippers and jump kicking in the air yelling, "naked Yoda ninja! naked Yoda ninja!"
Or then there was the time my husband was sleeping after working the night shift and I asked Jacson to be quiet. About three minutes after being in the bathroom I hear Jacson belting "Hello" by Adele at the top of his lungs. I ran out into the kitchen and said, "Jacson! What did I say to you before going into the bathroom?" Jacson: "be quiet....OHHHHH....But I love this song and I wanted to sing!"
My four year old, LIAM, has been hanging out with a jerk at school and bringing home some of his lovely behaviors such as grunting instead of using words to ask for things. He also enjoys body slamming my two year to the ground, but in his defense my two year old is a beast who has a tendency to bite so...I try to bond with him as much as I can, but his heart belongs to his daddy. I'm not complaining, there are worse things than having an awesome dad! The other day while waiting to pick up Jacson from school, Liam pulled a hair out of my head in an attempt to wrestle me like he does with his dad (lovely I know), and I decided to take the opportunity to show him the hair strand and teach him about DNA. I thought he'd be fascinated by the fact that each person has their own code and we can tell who was where with one strand of hair or a finger print or a drop of blood. He stopped for a minute as if he were deep in thought, he stuck his finger in his ear, pulled out some wax and jammed it in my mouth. Then he said, "Now you've got my DNA on your tooth!" So much for that moment.
My two year old, RORY, is such a cuddle monster and I mean that literally. He is constantly hugging and kissing everyone but he's so rough he might head butt you and break your nose in the process. This makes having a new baby in the house close to impossible as I live in fear of ever putting her down. I wonder what the neighbors think when they hear me scream, "Get off of her Rory!" He just giggles and runs away after nearly smothering her with "love." Being a tough guy does have its perks, however. He can completely destroy himself and instantly stop crying if I kiss the booboo. We're talking a terrible welt in his head and he makes a miraculous recovery with one kiss. This however, back fired when he fell onto an open drawer hurting his butt. "Kiss the butt mommy! KISS THE BUTT!"
This kid is so stubborn that he refuses to take a nap. I can lock him in his room and he will be quiet for an hour. When I go to wake him, he's sitting in his chair staring at the door. Totally creepy. At night he gives me some trouble with bed time as well. He will sit there holding the baby monitor and yell, "Goooonight mommy! I La You! Don't shut the door!" over and over again then suddenly, in his little deep voice, he'll say, "goodbye mommy." There I am thinking, goodbye? why would he say goodbye? is he okay? Don't you think it's weird for a child to say goodbye at bedtime!? We've finally come to an agreement where I won't shut the door if he stays in bed and so far so good.
He and the four year old are in an ongoing battle over basically all things in existence. This morning, for no apparent reason, though I'm sure it was provoked, he grabbed Liam's hot chocolate and threw it across the room, breaking the cup and splattering hot chocolate everywhere. As I cleaned it, the dogs took that opportunity to knock over the trash and so I was about two minutes late dropping Jacson off at school. I drove up to the school already defensive. If these people send him out to have me find a parking spot, take all of my children into the office just to tell them that he is two minutes late, which I'm sure they can see for themselves, I'm going to lose my shit. Did I mention my husband is at a wedding in the Florida Keys? He is going to owe me for life.
Needless to say, these kids are crazy, but they are also amazing! Jacson is scoring in the top 98th percentile in reading and math and he is competing in his first gymnastics meet this weekend. Although, him and Liam do not get along, he is amazing with the two youngest ones, which is a big help. Liam is super sweet with all kids not named Rory, he's very brave, he worships his dad and he's already athletically inclined. Rory is a beast who is scary strong, he is learning to speak so well, and he is totally into music, dancing and acting. It's the BEST to watch him FEEL the music or act out a death scene during his HULK SMASH routine! And then there is little Miss Marley who is super sweet and finding her place in this circus. I love this crew and although I might feel like I'm losing the battle at times, I know we must be doing something right to have such awesome little people. Maybe they are my hobby for now, but I'm choosing to be okay with that... I should have asked that woman if they have any packages revolving around showers and sleep.
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